Mindful Confrontation: 9 Steps to Handle Conflict in a Healthy Way Part 2 (by Melissa Eisler)
Okay, we are diving into Part Two of our series! What are your thoughts so far? Some of you may not have issues or challenges with confrontation, and others of you may have major challenges. It’s okay! We have to be comfortable to say to ourselves, “this is an area I am most uncomfortable.” You admittance to that does not make you a coward, or less adequate. It just means you welcome some guidance and counseling along the way.
It is my true desire that no matter what we discuss, you have the momentum to TAKE AIM! As my business continues to grow, I can’t just go along to get along. When something isn’t right, I have to speak up. When I do not want to move forward in a particular deal or speaking engagement, I have to confidently decline and feel absolutely okay with my decision. When someone on my team does not follow through, I politely follow up.
Confrontation can be healthy and not the elephant in the room. Like I said last week, “Confrontation with someone can be more healing than hurtful!”
This week we are dealing with Part Two of our series! We are discussing 9 steps to handle conflict in a healthy way! Don’t be scared…I am on this journey with you! The next time you have to deal with confrontation, I want you to refer back on this series and say, “I got this!”
Enjoy the blog below:
2. Assess Goals
Assess your current situation and ask yourself what your goals are. If you are secretly entering into a confrontation hoping that things will magically be set right—that you will be supported and nurtured the way you want or have always longed for—you may be highly disappointed during your confrontation.
Instead of hoping for a particular response, enter a confrontation because it will strengthen and empower you. You have the opportunity and power to assess the situation realistically, form realistic expectations, set protective ground rules (if needed), and say what you want to say directly and confidently.
Recognize and relinquish any and all unrealistic expectations you are carrying, to the greatest extent possible. It may be impossible to release everything—sometimes only repeated confrontations and disappointments make it possible to let go of tightly held false hopes.
3. Make a Plan
Having a plan is more about making sure that you truly know what you are standing up for and preparing to clearly express that objective. In being prepared, you will be able to tap into your plan during the confrontation and speak to clear, concise points that you want to get across. This will help you in coming off confident about your beliefs and where you stand.
Meditation can serve as a great way of helping you plan. Sit with your thoughts, discomforts, and fears and allow yourself to organize your thoughts and define objectives. The consistent practice of meditation will not only embed the plan in your mind, it will also help in building a calm and agile mind capable of responding mindfully to the adverse emotional reactions of those that you are confronting.
5. Learn from the Past
If you have been confronted or have confronted someone in the past, now is a good time to reflect on what worked well and what did not. This isn’t the time to beat yourself up over past mistakes, but to simply find areas you can improve and areas you want to repeat.
Live Life On The Promise Of Impact! Carenda Deonne – Your #1 Change Agent